SENIOR SEX

Young people think that the elderly do not have an active sex life. Research, however,shows that even before Viagra, many old people enjoy an active sex life. There is much discussion about senior problems, but very little about managing the sexual problems of the elderly. These problems cannot be diagnosed and treated, because no one accepts the fact that older people enjoy sex as much as you do.

National studies show that 60% of men and 12% of women between the ages of 75 – 85 still are sexually active, find sex important, and 46% report orgasm at least monthly. Erectile dysfunction is provoked by medication, prostatic disease, diabetes, and vascular disease. The ability to have an erection decreases with age from 97% before 60, 75% before 70, to 50% before 80. Most men are always interested in sex. Despite the use of drugs for erectile dysfunction, (desire, erection, orgasm and ejaculatory functions), most seniors have trouble talking about these problems with doctors. Asking about sexual problems is never on a doctor’s agenda especially in the elderly.

Being elderly you often are embarrassed talking about help for their low sex drive. However it has a great effect on the quality of their life. You would appreciate having their doctors bring up the subject. Sexual activity is a mark of good health and fitness.Sex is a good form of exercise, stimulates the brain, and is spiritually fulfilling. By choice or necessity, the elderly often seek gratification by self stimulation. Others find new partners to share sex and even have intimacy with same-sex partners. It is an individual choice. As one ages, there is a lack of intimacy physical contact, snuggling, talking, and sharing secrets. Intercourse is only one form of sexual expression.

Older men find that there is a delay in their erections, a need for more manual stimulation, the period between erection and ejaculation is prolong, and orgasm is shorter and less forceful (since the penis loses his firmness right after ejaculation). The time for repeat erections may take up to a week in elderly people. Men find if they cannot have an effective erection despite their manual stimulation they still don’t give up.

Some men use a vacuum pump device to aid in erections, others apply medication into the urethra, or inject themselves into the penis. With age,the general physical and psychological health of the seniors and the health problems of their partners diminish and lowers sexual function. Having sex depends on the health of the partner they are living with.

Men with sexual dysfunction are treated with Viagra, intra-urethral suppositories, penile injections, vacuum devices, and penile prostheses. For men, erectile dysfunction can be caused by various medical conditions that reduce the blood flow to the penis, medications, and by stress, depression and anxiety. Men who usually have two orgasms or more a week have lower mortality. This does not mean that sex prolongs life, but rather shows one is healthy and vigorous enough to have sex. Men find the physical attraction and desirable body of a woman a good enough reason to want sex. Men also have a need to have an orgasm more than women.

Many elderly women don’t have sex because they have itching, soreness, dryness, and pain during sex because of vaginal shrinking. Women find that their labia loses some firmness, the walls of the vagina become more rigid and dryer, and the clitoris becomes almost too sensitive for sex. Women find that lubrication may be a part of lovemaking and often older women use vaginal estrogens to get the desired effects on the vagina.

It’s hard to have interest in sex if you have a “painful experience”, have urinary incontinence, cancer, medical or surgical treatments, and receive no adequate treatments for the sexual problems. Women have less sex than men, primarily because men die sooner than women. Women complain about most sexual desires, dryness of the vagina and inability to climax. Yet women still want to express their love for their mate. Since men experience orgasms during heterosexual sexual intercourse they expect the same for their mates. Still, many women don’t have orgasm during intercourse and often don’t expect it.

If you ask for sex help, your doctor will think the are sex maniacs and abnormal by still wanting sex.You would prefer to talk about sexual issues with a doctor of the same sex, and would prefer that their adult children were not in the room. You sometimes think that sex is no longer appropriate now that you are finished with menopause and sex may even be immoral. You suppress your need for sex and find it difficult to enjoy sex spontaneously. The decrease in your vaginal secretions lead to pain during sex and your husbands sexual demands starts leading to relationship problems.

Smoking, obesity, depression, and diabetes all affect your sexual functioning. Solving these problems,perhaps with acupuncture, can keep you sexually active for many years .A previous heart attack or high blood pressure, triples your risk of a heart attack. If you’re not in good shape you put yourself at risk whether you exercise by walking, running, or having sex. Timing sex can be smart. Your risk is lower during the night but increases during the early morning hours.

Chronic diseases can affect your sex life. Sex can cause chest pain or even a heart attack. With lung disease, loss of breath may occur. With arthritis, some sexual positions become impossible. There is embarrassment over the presence of a colostomy bag, and medications often cause lack of libido or erectile dysfunction. You note decreased sensitivity for arousal and need longer and stronger stimulation of your penis, and you feel you are no longer capable of sex. You may also fear that sex will harm your health and this makes you abstain from sex or use drugs or alcohol to enhance your sexual performance.

Perhaps you think that sex is no longer appropriate after the menopause and may even be immoral. You suppress your need for sex and find it difficult to enjoy sex spontaneously because of decrease in your vaginal secretions during sex . Increasing health problems, and medical treatments reduce your sex drive and lacking a willing partner reduce your thoughts about sex. Your vagina has becomes narrower and shorter as you approach 70, and the vaginal walls are, thinner and stiffer. With less lubrication sex becomes uncomfortable. Eventually you feel that neither you nor your partner are interested in sex. This starts to ruin a good relationship. Your man starts feeling frustrated and unloved. Despite your health problems, you enjoy being caressed, stroked,and massaged and this leads to sexual activity if not sex itself.

Now that your children are gone, you don’t have to rush to work in the morning, and you are not expected to have perfect sexual performance. Intercourse is only one form of sexual expression. The object is to seek compassion and interpersonal sharing with your partner. Too often as you age,there is a lack of physical contact, snuggling, talking, sharing secrets and intimate physical contact.

To enjoy sex, you must be flexible and adapt to change. It now takes a lot longer and requires more manual stimulation and foreplay. You want to be loved, to be intimate, and to feel young and fit. Having sex keeps your body systems functioning, raises your pulse and heart rates, and stimulates your nerves and adrenal glands. Your aches and pains suddenly disappear, and you can handle stress better.

Some of the other ways of expressing love as: Love talk, tender gestures, kissing, and skin to skin fun can keep your partner warm, provide closeness and intimacy. Sex is a good form of exercise, stimulates the brain, and is spiritually fulfilling. By choice or necessity,as you age, you often seek gratification by self stimulation. You may even find a new partner to share sex and even have intimacy with same-sex partners. Its your individual choice. 3.21.2013

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